Burning away the Past and Embracing the Present- Death, The Three of Swords and The Hierophant

We’re just over half way through February and I’m starting to see a pattern emerge in my daily draws. So far a third of my draws have been made up of three cards, Death, the Three of Swords and The Hierophant. To be exact it has gone Death, the Three of Swords, Death, The Hierophant, the Three of Swords and The Hierophant. Whenever instances like this take place I take note, for they usually have a strong meaning behind them.

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Death – Shadowscapes Tarot

Since the last time I posted a few things have changed in my life. February the 3rds daily draw of Death was definitely fitting. I was going through a transition in the workplace, from acting manager of a store that was potentially closing down, to manager of a store which was now staying open. I had to make a decision as to whether this was where I wanted to be and allow all the past thoughts and fears to wash away. In a way, like the Phoenix on the card, who is death, rebirth and life encapsulated in one image, I was going through a rebirth. I needed to cleanse myself of the negative thoughts and feelings towards my job during that unstable period, so as to begin afresh under this new ownership.

Three of Swords
Three of Swords – Shadowscapes Tarot

Then came the Three of Swords on Feburary 7. Whenever this card comes to me I have a whole body reaction to it, it’s one of the only cards that does that to me. I think that subconsciously there is still a lingering link to my most recent heartbreak. I am so much better now than I was 6 or so months ago, but to be completely truthful I am not fully healed. The Swords have been removed, but the scars are definitely still there. I am still afraid of opening my heart back up. When this card first came to me I wasn’t 100% sure whether it was to do with that past situation or to do with my present. For recently a new person has entered my life, a person whom I really enjoy spending time with and who makes me feel happy inside. It wasn’t until the next day when I drew the Two of Swords, the card of conflict between heart and mind, that I began to think of the Three’s potential meaning. To be honest with myself previous to this draw I felt like I was split in two, half of me really wanted to pursue this budding relationship, to throw myself in completely, but the other half, the logical half, kept bringing up the fact that I had been planning on leaving the country in August (if not for good then for a long period of time). I was and have since been stuck in this conflict between what I’m feeling and what I’m thinking. And I fear that heartbreak may ensue, I’m just not sure whose heart it is that the Swan represents.

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A Passage Away from Difficulties – The Six of Swords

So as it turns out The Hanged Man’s message (seen in my last post) was much harder to take in than I expected! As those of you who have been reading my blog since it’s birth would know, 2015 has been a tumultuous year for me. But while there has been a lot of pain this year, it has also been a year of self-discovery and a deep questioning of what it actually IS that drives me! While this was spurred on by a negative emotional event, which to be honest has pretty much bled into most of my year, it has in turn helped me develop more positive and helpful ways of looking at pain and ‘negative’ emotions. But like most things, this is a stage of development that is going to require a lot of effort, and a lot of time! And during this stage there are of course going to be ups and downs, which I understand, but the fact that I have little control over this is starting to get to me! A month or so ago I was finally starting to feel like I was on the right track, and beginning to open myself up to the world again! To let my vulnerability see the light of day and venture out of the cage of safety I had created for myself since May’s events. But I never imagined it would be this difficult! It’s such an odd experience to feel like you aren’t the person you used to be, I find myself questioning every little thing I do, which is incredibly draining, and I no longer feel comfortable when in new or unfamiliar situations. I’ve tried to put myself out there lately, to meet new people, and get out of my comfort zone, but in these situations I find myself questioning every little thing I’m saying and wondering if the person sitting opposite me is even interested. And I am trying my best to listen to The Hanged Man and his message of letting go, I really am, but I think I’m scared that if I let go of the semblance of control I feel I have, I will be completely lost. And that thought frightens me! So after spending some time with The Hanged Man, I decided that it was time to pull another card of the day to see if the Shadowscapes had anything to help me through this process, and up came the Six of Swords.

The Six of Swords represents a state of despondency, those times when you feel like you are only just keeping your head out of the water, your not incredibly sad, but your not happy either. It’s a dull, listless feeling. But it’s not all bad, it shows that there is a way out! Quite often this card represents the beginning of a new phase after a time of upheaval, a journey away from a stage of unhappiness to a better place. It can represent a change in your frame of mind, or an actual physical journey away from a negative situation. And on top of that, there is help on this journey, you don’t have to do it alone!

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Six of Swords – Rider Waite Smith Tarot

Here in the RWS image we see a cloaked figure and a child, huddled together, being ferried off to an island in the distance. The figure is cloaked, which to me represents loss and sadness, that all too familiar feeling that occurs when you are leaving something behind in your past! Another important image that solidifies this is that the water to the right of the boat is rough and choppy, whereas the water to the left, towards the island and hence the direction they are going, is smooth and calm. This shows that the woman and the child are moving away from turmoil and conflict towards a calm and tranquil future. And this I think is the key to this card. Although we may be sad by our loss or predicament, as we move away from the past and its turmoil there is a sense of moving into a brighter future.

And then there is the ferryman, representative of the help that we may find along the way, and also importantly the 6 upright swords in the boat, representative of the importance of a logical frame of mind in these situations. Another way I like to look a these Swords is in the fact that they are not sinking the boat, nor weighing it down! In this respect it is important to realise that on this journey we may carry our past with us, but it will not weigh us down or sink us! Also I feel that the fact that they are coming with the woman and child on this journey shows that they represent something that the two figures have been dealing with for a long time, something that may no longer be painful but that stays with us throughout our life.

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Six of Swords – Shadowscapes Tarot

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